Relationships (Staying Vs. Leaving)

This is a difficult decision that we may have to face from time to time. We always talk about falling in love, but it’s rare to talk about falling out of love. This situation is the most painful and confusing. You may be thinking, Am I wasting my time in my relationship? or Why can’t we be like we used to? 

Jumping to the conclusion that you must leave a relationship if you’re unhappy may be impulsive. Deciding whether or not to leave takes a lot of time to process.  The first question you should ask yourself is Can these issues be fixed?

Trying to work problems out with your partner is an absolutely essential plan. If you leave the relationship without trying to solve issues, you may regret it later. (If you would like to learn about resolving issues, I recommend this article by Love is Respect)

Before you decide to leave, here are some things to consider:

Is there someone else? When relationships mature we are exposed to the ugly in our partners. Finding a new person may be exciting, but recognize that this new person also has ugly characteristics. Think of the long-term, is this new person truly better and convenient for your future?

Are you dealing with change? In every new situation that we encounter there are some setbacks. Adapting to a new home or job puts a strain on our relationships. If you are stressed you might be projecting that feeling onto your partner. Think about what you need and how you can get what you need respectively.

Did you get a hint of the single life? Sometimes in a long-term relationship, we’re granted with an opportunity to feel single. Freedom is a beautiful thing, and we should consider what is holding us back from obtaining it. If you feel like you and your partner never have a break, I recommend reading The Power of Parting. Think of how you can incorporate that freedom into your relationship.

As you continue to think about this, recognize that this decision is going to need some time to grow. No matter what you decide, knowing that you took the time to process, makes the choice worth taking.

If you liked this post, I recommend reading: Losing Yourself in A Relationship

-A.Waver

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